It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
