guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
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