I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
