This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
