No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
