yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
