Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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