I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize