so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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