Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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