On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
