Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
