omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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