Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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