porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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