Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
