I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
