I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize