He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize
