grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
