I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
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