So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
