Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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