I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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