He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
