My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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