that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize