I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
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