be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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