also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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