i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
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