I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize