i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
we made out on top of his cat.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
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