shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
