Can Purell be used as lube?
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I fill condoms, not promises.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
