apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
