I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize