no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Randomize
