He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize