walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
