i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Randomize
