PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
