Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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