I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
smell my finger.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
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