People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
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