Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
