Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Randomize
