So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize