they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
