yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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