She said her name was "party"
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
You pole danced in your parka.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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