Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
